Bitten I thought I was by Cupid’s arrow on the morning of my seventh wedding anniversary, but No. It was in fact a hornet. There I was, flying into my Friday at an eye-opening clip on the moped, my blouse, apparently, open. Within sight of the hospital, I felt a thwap on my chest which I assumed was a rock or a nut loosed from one of the trees overhead. Then the shoot of pain tearing through my left breast. I kid you not, I could feel the sting in my left hand and up the left side of my neck, and wondered for a blink if all the French fries I have eaten in my life have finally come back to haunt me. Turns out, I was stung in the heart, or at least near enough that my nerves could tell no difference.
This is how I know I missed my calling to serve in the military. At 30 mph, I neither swerved nor slowed while a hornet ground its nethers into my chest. I crushed the wasp and flicked its crinkled corpse into the air, while trying to distract myself with the jokes I might tell my team once I made it to work. “If I were a flat-chested woman, I would consider myself lucky to get this particular sting. Might have even let the bug do the other side.” The welt remains like a pseudo boob. Which, I suppose, is for KP an unexpected anniversary gift in its own right. Happy 7th!
Pane al Formication, er, Formaggio
Adapted from The Italian Baker
1 cup sourdough starter
1 cup warm water
2 eggs, room temperature
2 tablespoons olive oil
3 ¾ cups unbleached all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons salt
¾ cup grated Parmesan cheese
½ cup grated pecorino cheese
Cornmeal
1 egg white, beaten
Stir in the sourdough into the water in a large mixing bowl; let stand until creamy, about 10 minutes. Whisk in the eggs and oil. Mix the flour and salt and stir half into the mixture; stir in the remaining flour with the cheese. Knead on a lightly floured surface, sprinkling with 2 or 3 tablespoons additional flour as needed, until firm, elastic and silky, 8 to 10 minutes. The texture may be slightly gritty from the cheese.
Place the dough in a lightly oiled bowl, cover with plastic wrap, and let rise until doubled, about 2 hours.
Punch the dough down on a lightly floured surface and knead briefly. Cut the dough in half and shape each piece into a round loaf or a log that is fatter in the middle and tapered at the ends. Place on a baking sheet or peel sprinkled with cornmeal, cover with a towel, and let rise until doubled, about 1 hour.
Thirty minutes before baking, heat the oven with a baking stone in it to 425. Just before baking, brush the loaves with the egg white. Slash the long loaves with 3 parallel cuts, using a razor. Sprinkle the stone with cornmeal and slide the loaves onto it. Bake 40 minutes, spraying 3 times with water in the first 10 minutes. Cool completely on a rack. If you experience the sensation of bugs crawling on or under your skin its because A) You are actually a bread addict and this post has you jonesing; B) You read this post and you are my mother and highly suggestible. Now that you mention it I think I do feel a bee stinging me right now!; or C) You live in Minnesota, and bugs actually are crawling all over you. DEET is no match for the entomological explosion that is this summer.
Hope you are feeling better and back to symmetry:-)
Your sense of humor, and creativity are unmatched 🙂 Happy Belated Anniversary to a simply amazing couple! I hope you’ve been enjoying the celebrations of this special event!